Toxic talk

You know how it goes. You call a friend thinking you will just catch up, and before you know it she is either complaining about how she is growing out of all her clothes, or she just hit the diet jackpot and recently lost 15 pounds. You want to relate to her or comfort her by identifying with where she is emotionally, but all you can think is...come on, is this all there is to life? And yet, there is something central in our desire to want to compete with one another or look the best. We want to be beautiful, and we want to feel confident in our own skin. We have been trained by society to believe that when we are in pain it is out bodies fault, or that the only way we can be truly happy, is when our body looks exactly as it "should". Where is the authenticity in thinking like this?

Let's be honest, haven't we all stepped on the scale at some point in our life and allowed it to dictate how we felt about ourselves? Less in this case might equal "good", and more might equal "bad" and if we are "bad" we must "fix" ourselves. This leads to patterns of self-destruction by yo-yo eating and erratic or extreme exercise to make sure we stay within the box. Why in the world do we all think we have to try to be the same size or that this is better? Obviously, our society places a great emphasis on thinness. Did you know that the center for disease control is coming out with new research that suggests that those who are in the overweight health category actually live the longest? Ha! Take that all you who say that it isn't about being thin it's about being healthy. Being healthy means we do things that support our entire life: body, mind, and spirit. We nourish our body with a wide variety of foods that help energize us and bring us satisfaction, we choose movement that helps us feel better in all of our daily tasks and that makes us feel alive, and we spend time developing our sense of self by identifying and investing in ourselves.

Your weight isn't a behavior. It might be one result of many behaviors, but let's start sharing these behaviors with our friends. In doing so we highlight the real issue behind the number or the size. Seek out communities that will support you in your quest to maintain self-love and a life of healthy habits around loving the skin you are in. Talk can be toxic, so let's clean it up and start loving one another to our own greatness. Because, we are all different...and that's beautiful.

What gives you Hope?

We stand in hope every day of our lives. If we don't, we are in despair. To be in despair is to lose all hope or confidence. To hope is to long for the best outcome in our lives; to expect our dreams will be fulfilled; and to live with optimism about our choices.

It is possible to go about life from day to day trying to ignore our hopes for a better world, an easier lifestyle, a smaller pants size, or our desire to find the perfect job. But it is in hoping that we are brought to a place where we must trust that our lives and the lives of those around us really do matter. As we hope, we put ourselves in a position where we must believe in an inherent good, regardless of where we feel like life has done us "wrong". Where have you been "wronged"? Are you disappointed about something you can't seem to achieve, or that your feel you deserve, but aren't getting? With all the devastation around us it is natural to get pulled into a state of disappointment.

This video made me think about what I am hoping for, in the midst of my disappointment. How can you keep you own hope alive for the goodness of life to prevail today? I challenge you to ask the question, and start asking others what they hope for. You might be surprised to find that your previous state of despair will start to deflate as you notice the kindness and love around you.

Are you Healthy?

In 1986, the World Health Organization defined health as "a resource for everyday life, not the objective of living. Health is a positive concept emphasizing social and personal resources, as well as physical capacities." Umm. OK. So what does that mean??

Let's just say health is achieved through the well-being of our physical, mental, emotional & social "Health Triangle". Each of these categories has multiple definitions, we can individualize them to make them even more unique in their specificity. So, how do we know if we are "healthy"? There are multiple blood tests, scans, physical exams, mental tests, and emotional markers to look at, but lets focus on a few that you can start paying attention to right now in your own home:

1) Resting Heart Rate: The best time to find out your resting heart rate is in the morning, after a good night's sleep, and before you get out of bed. It is easiest to find you pulse at your wrist or neck. Ideally, your resting heart rate will fall somewhere between 55-75 beats per minute, with athletes showing heart rates as low as 40 beats per minute. As you track your resting heart rate, you may notice that you can predict when you are coming down with an infection, are over training, or under more stress than normal. Having a lower resting heart rate will also indicate that you are improving your health over time.
2) Hydration Urine Test: The color of your urine can indicate your hydration level (see color chart). The optimal color of urine is a straw yellow color. Mild dehydration will make your urine a slightly darker or brighter yellow color. If your urine is bordering on a golden-brown color you are severely dehydrated. Some vitamins can change the color of your urine, so keep this in mind. Dehydration can lead to an increased heart rate, headaches, thirst, dry or acne prone skin, muscle cramping, constipation, fatigue, decreased sweating, an increase in body temperature, and much more. At a mere 10% dehydration level, our cells begin to get compromised and can start to die.
3) Body Circumference Measures: You can simply measure at the arms, chest, waist, hips, and thighs and add the total for a way to compare how your body can change with improved exercise and nutrition. But the US Navy has come up with a way to use 3-4 measurement sites to estimate your body fat percentage. You will need to know your height and the circumference measure around your neck (just below the larynx or "adams apple"), at the smallest part of your waist, and hips (for women only). Once you have these measures you can plug them in to this online calculator. Recommendations for body fat percentages depend on your age, but should ideally fall somewhere between 23-39% for women, and 15-27% for men.
4) Mental Health Questionnaires: There are multiple different questionnaires that target specific mental and emotional issues. Mental-Health-Today has some great tests that will give you results for you to take to a qualified physician or counselor for further assistance. If you test OK, and just need a boost in your mental fitness, try these websites for some exercise for your brain!
5) Know your Values: Often times our relationships turn sour when we don't honor our own values or we choose to take on the value of others rather than value ourselves. Take this test to assess your core values and get real with your social health.

Above all, listen to your heart and body. Do you feel healthy? If you don't get a check-up with your doctor, join a health club or support group, and start making a plan to take one step at a time to improve how you feel physically, mentally, and emotionally. The only person who can ultimately change you is YOU! Take control of the things that are in immediate need today, even if that means letting go of a few friends or habits. For more information about healthy habits, see my RestoreFitness YouTube videos!